From Setbacks to Spain: How I Chose Adventure Over Fear

September 18, 2024

Getting a concussion and being laid off from my first job post-grad was not on my 2024 bingo card, yet here I am, sitting in Miami’s Spain Visa Center waiting to pick up my visa that will allow me to teach English in Madrid for the next year. That sentence doesn’t make sense to me either, but that’s sort of the way this year has unfolded.

The route to this decision has not been easy. 

First, there are my family and friends who I love dearly, and vice versa. How could I leave them here, a 9-hour plane ride away? 

Second, I was scared to bring any hindrance to my career. Will companies still want to hire me once I come back? Would they see it as a vacation and not valuable work?

Third, I am scared of letting my parents down. They came from Mexico to the United States for a better life and to give us opportunities they never got. Would leaving the U.S. mean that the dream they envisioned was taken away from them? 

I worked through these thoughts enough to make it this far in the process! I used to be prone to letting the voices of fear, guilt, and anxiety get to me, but as I have grown, I realized that I have to do what makes me happy. This time of self-discovery at 25 will pass anyway. Why not spend it the way I have always envisioned it?

1. Fears of leaving loved ones

My friends and family assured me that they were not going anywhere. No matter where we are, we will always be connected through an invisible string that keeps us tied together. We may have to settle for calls and texts instead of physically pulling that string when we miss each other, but that’s okay. It also gives them an excuse to plan a trip to Spain and see the other side of the world. 

2. Doubts about career

My career just started and this is the time to do something this bold since I am so new to the workforce. I don’t have much responsibility and that isn’t a bad thing! When I return to the United States, I hope companies see the worth and work it takes to move abroad and teach English. There will be many transferable skills I will be ready to bring back.

3. Weight of parents' sacrifices

My parents know what it takes to move to a new country where you don’t know anyone and the challenges it comes with. At first, they were apprehensive about this idea; but they knew it wouldn’t be anything near what they experienced. I do not think they thought I would do it since I’ve always talked about moving but was never bold enough to follow through. It wasn't until I turned in my passport for my visa that things became very real. We have had many discussions in which they have had to quiet my anxiety by telling me that these were the opportunities they didn’t have. These are the moments they dreamed of, for their kids to be able to do what they want as long as they are not hurting anybody. 

Honestly, I don’t know what to expect from this experience. It will be the hardest thing I have done thus far, but I also know it will be the most rewarding. I have been in my comfort zone for many years. It is time I take that leap of faith in myself. I am doing this because I believe in myself. I believe in my dreams turning into reality.