Overcoming Imposter Syndrome as an English Language Assistant
When I was in the fifth grade, I got the word “a” wrong on a spelling test. I spelled it U-H, because that’s how it was pronounced. Needless to say, I was not born gifted in English. Now, over a decade later, I am the one teaching English to fifth graders. Although my English has come a long way (thank god), I still have moments of doubt where I find myself questioning whether or not I’m really qualified to be teaching my native language. I’ve felt dumbfounded asked to describe question tags, the difference between “for” and “since”, the order of adjectives, and more - all of which come naturally to me as a native speaker. If you are a current or prospective language assistant with the same worry that you will be insufficient in teaching, here are three tips to overcome your imposter syndrome.
Play off your strengths:
I’ve always had a love for art, and I consider myself to be pretty good at it. In moments where I’ve felt insufficient in my teaching capabilities, I have made it well-known that I can be trusted to lead art projects. Eventually, I have built up a reputation of being “the crafty one”, which makes me feel like I serve a purpose outside of my English assistant role. If you have a talent that can lend itself to a classroom setting in any way, use it.
Seek feedback:
This is a cultural difference that I have noticed between the US and Spain. In the US, it is customary to have regular performance reviews and a communicative relationship with your superior. As an employee in Spain, the expectation is much different. Performance reviews are not given regularly, if at all. Typically, an employer won’t explicitly say that they are dissatisfied with their employee. If you are looking for reassurance that you’re performing well, or validation that you aren’t, you will have to ask for feedback directly. Asking for feedback won’t necessarily mute the voice telling you that you’re insufficient at your job, but at the very least it will give you tangible steps to take to become a better employee.
Ask for help:
Imposter syndrome can be cyclical: you don’t feel like you know what you’re doing, so you pretend to know what you’re doing, until you legitimately don’t know what you’re doing. One of the best things I’ve done to break the cycle of imposter syndrome is admitting that I needed help, and then asking for it. There is not one way to be a great language assistant. Even the most qualified candidate will have questions and need help from time to time. Asking questions won’t make you appear to be bad at your job, if anything, it will make you appear more engaged.
Teaching in Madrid has been simultaneously a very humbling and empowering experience. It has shown me that I am fully capable of thriving in a role that challenges me, despite at times feeling like a fraud. For any current or future language assistant who has faced the same feelings of imposter syndrome that I have, I am here to assure you that you have more potential than you give yourself credit. You’ve just read an entire blog post by somebody who used to spell “a” U-H. You can do this.
Until next time,
Chloe
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