How to Talk to Your Teen About College
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Throughout your teen’s college decision process, the best thing you can do is offer as much support and assistance as possible so they can make the best decisions for their future. But how should you go about having your college talk? For starters, learning how to talk so teens will listen is a big part of sending your teen off to college.
This guide shares some tips for doing just that so you can have engaging and meaningful conversations with your teen before they leave home.
Consider Your Approach to Having These Discussions
How you approach your teen to have the college talk is very important. Parents should be careful that their tone of voice when asking questions or sharing opinions is calm and positive. Your body language and facial expressions can affect the conversation as well, so it’s best to stay neutral.
It’s also essential that how you ask your teen questions about their college goals is carefully worded. Open-ended questions that allow your teen to voice their opinions freely, instead of pointed yes or no questions, can make a big difference.
Attend College Fairs and Webinars
College fairs and virtual webinars can provide a lot of helpful information and tips for parents and teens going through the college application process. Having up-to-date information about your teen’s options and the current state of higher education allows you to offer informed support to your teen.
To learn about study abroad options for their first year, check out our First Year Abroad webinars. Past recordings are available too.
Build a College Options List with Your Teen
There are a lot of exciting options out there when it comes time to decide what to do after high school graduation. And the last thing you want to do is rush your teen into making a decision. Slowing down and creating a college options list with detailed pros and cons can open your eyes to the best choices for your teen’s interests, professional goals and desired experience.
Colleges come in all shapes and sizes, so making note of class size, campus layout, student living arrangements, extracurriculars and college amenities will allow your teen to see the big picture when it comes time to decide.
Discuss Their College Location (Without Bias)
Another major component of choosing a college is its location. Your teen has the entire world at their fingertips and can choose to attend a college in-state, out-of-state, entirely abroad, or even partially abroad.
Here are some of the benefits of each option and how you can guide your teen through making their selection:
- Attending college in-state allows students to stay close to home while enjoying generally lower tuition rates. Parents can highlight choosing an in-state school as a way to balance education with financial savings.
- Going out-of-state for college offers students the chance to experience new environments and greater independence. Parents can explain that it’s an opportunity for personal growth and expanding horizons.
- Studying abroad in college provides students with a global perspective and unique cultural experiences. Studying abroad is an enriching way to work toward a degree but also gain cultural awareness and valuable personal skills.
CIEE’s First Year Abroad programs are an excellent option that provide the best of college abroad with a normal experience here in the U.S. FYA programs allow new college students to complete their general education credit requirements abroad while seeing the world.
They’re also an excellent option for students who don’t get into their dream college and wish to take a year off to better their application for the next cycle.
Learn more about what to expect on a First Year Abroad program.
Set Realistic Expectations for Their College Experience
Your teen's transition from high school to college is a big one. They're about to enter the world as an independent adult, and it’s essential as a parent to support your teen’s success by setting realistic expectations for their college experience. Some of the biggest life changes your teen will face after high school are paying bills, managing increased academic responsibility and learning how to handle the stress of juggling everything at once.
Offer Positive Emotional Support
As you can imagine, the start of college can be stressful. Parents can help their teens by being there as a positive support system as they cope with the ups and downs that come with a new chapter. Even just being there as an active listener and a safe space for your teen to vent can help them immensely. Parents may want to jot down some pre-planned college conversation starters to help open that supportive channel of communication.
Some questions to ask about college are:
- Why do you want to go to college?
- What do you think you want to study?
- What are you most excited about/scared of college?
- How do you feel about living away from home for the first time?
Offer Financial Planning Assistance
When your teen moves away from home, they'll need to begin thinking about finances. Having the ability to responsibly manage money is a skill every adult needs. Teaching your teen how to create a budget and monitor their finances consistently will help set them up for success.
It's also important to sit your teen down to discuss their financial options for funding their college education. Whether or not you can help your teen with college costs, they'll need sound financial advice for navigating federal and private financial aid options and applying for scholarships.
Be Flexible to What Your Teen Chooses
Whether your teen decides to attend college close to home, out of state or even abroad with a program like CIEE’s First Year Abroad, sitting them down for a meaningful chat and accepting what they choose is a rite of passage for both parents and teens. It helps create a foundation of trust and support with your teen and allows them to forge their own path forward.
To help your teen understand all of their college options, learn more about CIEE’s First Year Abroad programs.